This is a great video that a friend posted on Facebook. Wow. Just wow.
I feel like I have even been guilty of talking to my students or patients at the hospital as if their speech output is an indication at all of their comprehension/understanding. It must be maddening to walk around every day feeling trapped inside their body. Not only do some people struggle to communicate in their bodies, but sometimes they feel dramatic changes in sensory experiences, too. Like fire running down your side... ants crawling on my back... pricks on the back of my arms. I have heard all of these before. Can you even imagine? I'd scream and "meltdown" if I felt this way too. We should be comforting during behavior meltdowns, not punishing....
It definitely takes a second for us to realize what it must be like to be living with a disability. Some people, like my brother, maybe aren't as aware they are even different in the first place. He is unaware and insanely HAPPY. He loves his life exactly how it is. He sees everyone as being on the same playing field, doesn't discriminate because he doesn't even know how, trusts people before he judges them... We could all learn from him and others like him.
But then there are those who DO know they are different. They know it and struggle with it every morning they wake up. They want to be just like everyone else. No matter how hard they try and work at it, their bodies or their minds remain what society deems "different". It's an uphill battle and it's their battle to fight every day. I can't even imagine.
I used to work with a young boy who was hit by a drunk driver. He lived, but sustained a traumatic brain injury, physical impairments, and speech difficulties. He is now in a wheelchair, struggles to communicate, and will forever be "different". I always think of him and the person who hit him. I hope it is was worth the "buzz" that night... When you ask this kid what frustrates him the most is that "just because I'm in a wheelchair and it takes me a long time to communicate, people think I'm useless. Stupid. Unable to have a conversation." He has so much to say, but can't say it. How frustrating!
I'm not writing this to depress anyone! :) I just feel like we aught to stop and think more about others around us. How to make those who are different feel less different. And there's a difference between "different" and "special".... feeling different means feeling excluded, feeling unwanted, feeling left out. Special means having a new or unique way to BE included. It's society's job to do their part. To take the time. Let them FINISH what they're saying-- we can't assume we already know. Don't talk to an 18 year old who is nonverbal as if they were a toddler. Don't rush someone through the checkout who takes longer to get around. Smile more at those who are special instead of staring. TEACH your kids about disabilities and how to react and how to include them. We need to encourage disability awareness training in our schools and in our homes!
My brother is the biggest gift our family could have asked for, and we wouldn't have wanted him ANY other way. He has Down syndrome. He might not have the sensory difficulties that people with autism have, but he does have trouble communicating, will never get married or have kids, makes WAY less than minimum wage because he is "different".... but in my eyes, He IS PERFECT. He is loving, kind, trust worthy, dependable and someone of the highest character. Take a minute to stop and learn from those who we think are not "teachable". You'll be amazed. :)
Please post your thoughts after watching this short video.
It was hard to see this girl struggle with being heard. It is especially hard since you know that her father and her sister both believed they were being helpful. We have all, with the best of intentions, tried to give choices to a student in hopes of motivating him or her. Unfortunately we may not pick things that are motivating. For students that are non-verbal, we really need to pay attention to the subtle clues they give us. It may take a long time to get to know what clues to look for, but the more you work with a student the easier it will get.
ReplyDeleteSo true.
ReplyDeleteThis video was difficult and sad to watch. I'm sure I am guilty of giving someone a voice when they already have one for themselves. Just like Carly's father I was simply trying to help and I never stopped to think how this could make someone feel. I think it is important to look at ques that non verbal students are giving us. It is important to give these students enough time to process their thoughts and also allow them time to respond. Although it might take them longer they will eventually find a way express what they are thinking.
ReplyDeleteExtra processing time is key!
ReplyDeleteThis video reminds me of a student in my class. He has behavior difficulties and often lashes out at others. One particular day another student made him upset. He became angry, began growling and tried to grab the other student. He was reprimanded for lashing out but felt it was unfair that the other student wasn't reprimanded for what he did. When I got back to the room after a meeting, I told the other teacher to leave and I sat with my student for about 20 minutes. Ten minutes was in silence until I could hear that he was calming down. I asked him if he was ready to tell me what made him upset and he wouldn't speak. It occurred to me that maybe he didn't have the words to express his thoughts. I asked him if he wanted to draw a picture about what happened. He got up, started drawing on the board and I was able to understand what made him so upset. A little patience and understanding go a long way, especially for someone that has difficulty in expressing their thoughts in words.
ReplyDeletePatience and understanding do go a long way!
ReplyDeleteI enjoyed watching this video because it is hard to sometimes think of individuals who are non-verbal no have a voice or those individuals who are verbal but can't express their feelings. Very often at my other job I start giving choices to the participants when they begin feeling agitated and won't express their feelings. Many times I need to take a step back and think of them and give them time to express themselves. This video is a good reminder to give individuals their own voice and not to speak for them or at them in a way that is immature for them.
ReplyDeleteGiving everyone a voice is so critical.
DeleteI absolutely loved this video! I remember watching many other videos about "Carly's Voice" in the past and it was very heartwarming and heartbreaking at the same time! I read the book a couple years ago and was just blown away and mesmerized by her story. She gives hope to others that are like her as well as to the people around her that never gave up on her. Amazing story!
ReplyDeleteCarly certainly does give hope to others.
DeleteI really enjoyed watching this video. I love how they incorporated her perspective and thoughts. I purchased her book, and am excited to learn more about her experience. There have been a few students that I have came encounter with like Carly. I often wonder what he or she is thinking, and how much he or she understands. On a not so positive note, I have always seen staff members talk about whatever they feel like in front of students who are nonverbal, and appear to not understand things. This always made me nervous for those people, because sometime we do not know, and that is not fair to the student. Videos like these remind me that we need to have patients as educators, and we need to continue to try to find different ways a nonverbal person can use to express themselves. Sometimes it is technology, and other times it is as simple as having them draw a picture (like Terri stated).
ReplyDeleteBoy, that is so true about talking in front of students- something we should all avoid.
ReplyDelete